Bought a Car or How to give your pregnant wife a heart attack

When I fell pregnant with our 3rd child we realised that our old 1989 Holden Barina was not going to fit a baby seat, a booster seat and a 10 year old comfortably in the back, not to mention carting a pram, port-a-cot, nappy bag, kitchen sink etc etc etc so we started the search for new wheels.

This search lasted months because we wanted a 4x4 type vehicle, low km, under $30K and not white. We had our hearts set on either a Toyota Prado or a Mitsubishi Pajero until we saw the Toyota Kluger which we fell in love with because it had everything we wanted and it was new BUT was way out of our price range.

We scoured our local papers, the weekend newspapers, our free paper the Quokka and just couldnt find the right vehicle for us, they were either too expensive, had too many km's or were white. We hate white cars.... boring.

My work was chaotic, worse than chaotic, it was insane and I was stressed to the max not to mention 25 or so weeks pregnant and not coping very well. Just thought I'd throw that one in, you'll get the relevance later.

Seeing as we couldnt buy local Dave extended the search online, right across Australia!

One morning while we are both at work he emails me a link to a 2003 Toyota Kluger which was priced at the upper end of our price limit but had done low km's, was gold and had everything we wanted. It was perfect except for the fact that it was in Sydney and we were in Perth!

We discuss this car over the course of a couple of days and basically make no real decision about a purchase until........

several days later my husband turns up at the door to my office and says "Come see the car I just bought" and takes off towards the front door! I blindly follow him to a white Kluger where I speechlessly ask him (yes I know I can do amazing things) who's car is this?, what are you doing with it? who's car is this? He strings me along for a while telling me it is ours when he suddenly realises that his rather pregnant for a third time and over it wife has had enough and really needs to be let in on the joke.

He purchased the gold Kluger in Sydney sight unseen, undriven, uninspected, un un un un everything. Wow he has never done anything that scary before..... or has he, he probably has but I have selective amnesia and choose not to remember.

We still have the car, it is as perfect as a car gets, we love it. I love it, it is MINE!

Conversation with Tyler aged 4.8

“I like your shiny hair mum” he says to me as he is stroking the back of my head. And it is true I do have shiny hair as do lots of women with very straight, very dark hair. I get lots of comments from random people who tell me I have shiny hair. I get told I have white teeth too. Strange but true. He then continued with

“and you have nice boobies too” as he gives my right boob a rub. Thanks Ty, not sure about the appropriateness of you telling me so but thanks anyway.

The husband and I had a good laugh at his expense.

Curiouser and Curiouser

Here’s something that doesn’t happen everyday. I have recently returned to work after being on maternity leave for the past 16 months. I have returned to a job in one of the Divisional offices at the University I work. The Division has recently merged with another Division so a few things are still up in the air such as where I will call home on a permanent basis – or which desk is mine.

I have been given temporary residence in the back corner of a largish open plan office. All is good except that I keep knocking my feet on the numerous boxes stored under my desk. Being that this is not MY desk and that its previous owner is likely to return I have not disturbed or looked at these boxes presuming them to contain paperwork relating to other peoples jobs or even perhaps shockingly enough that they contain the envelopes their box claims to hold.

Today I kicked my toe for the last time; I took the bold move and ventured under my desk, in amongst the dust bunnies, tiny bits of uneaten sandwich, chocolate and chips, lost paperclips, used staples and the odd thumb tack. I located the source of my discomfort and dragged four small boxes, 3 of standard envelope size and one photocopy paper size. The photocopy box contained as I suspected paperwork so I shoved it back whence it came. (Whence is a great word isn’t it?) I opened the first of the envelope boxes; I was greeted by a family of shiny silvery silver fish who I promptly eliminated. RIP Silverfish family. To my shock and amazement the box contained…. Queue dramatic music dum dum dah…… a brick! I quickly opened the remaining two boxes anticipation filling my very soul. Two more bricks!

Now why on earth would someone want 3 boxes filled with bricks under their desk…… Never fear as I know you will be as troubled as I was at this bizarre turn of events, I promise dear reader to put my Sherlock Holmes skills to good use and unearth what has become known as “The Mystery of the Bricks in Envelope Boxes”

Stay tuned, all will be revealed.